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F@ck 2016!

F@ck 2016!

What an incredibly crap year! Anyone feel any different? Come on raise your hand…please, prove me wrong. David Bowie, Leonard Cohen, Prince, my relationship, Donald Trump, Brexit, Allepo…the list goes on and on. And oh, did I mention my relationship? Yes?! Well, to borrow a phrase from my father who is currently visiting from the […]

Striving towards Life
,

Striving towards Life

Today’s selection — from When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi. In May 2013, at 36, Paul Kalanithi was diagnosed with stage IV metastatic lung cancer. At first, Paul prepared for death, then, he and his wife Lucy decided to have a child. ” Flush in the face of mortality, many decisions became compressed, urgent […]

Who Rescues  the Rescuer?

Who Rescues the Rescuer?

Being a rescuer of others in emotional distress is a popular gig. As children, many of us learnt that fulfilling this role afforded us a modicum of immunity within our often volatile family ecosystems. Being the emotional support of a sick, depressed mother, or alcoholic personality disordered father may have brought a degree of proximity […]

A Loving Equation
,

A Loving Equation

It’s been a tough couple of months. Love and I have had some fierce skirmishes. I’ve retreated from the field, confused, battered. Now is time to examine my strategy, courageously, honestly. “Love is the hospital for our old wounds”- Hollis wrote. Love changes us, as it works on our painful personal histories (loss, abandonment, betrayal, […]

On feeling depressed…
,

On feeling depressed…

We’re not talking about the extreme, most paralysing, regions of despair – where external medical help is vital. Our target is rather the times when we feel – as indicated by Henry David Thoreau’s phrase – mired in moods of ‘quiet desperation’: a large, grey hinterland in which beneath an outward surface of endurance, we […]

Insomnia- searching for the sandman.
,

Insomnia- searching for the sandman.

Things have been crap lately and I’ve spent hundreds of hours awake in the thin hours of morning. During that time, I stumbled across this article on insomnia which I found useful, enjoy. In 1914, The Lancet reported on a clergyman who was found dead in a pool; he had left behind this suicide note: […]

How to survive an adolescent, Act 1.
, ,

How to survive an adolescent, Act 1.

“You just don’t get it! You’re so cruel! Why did you even have children if you can’t be a parent?! All my other friends parents would let them go [to the party]!” My 13 year old daughter screams as she slams the door to her unkempt room, the house fills with the now all too […]

How memory works.
, ,

How memory works.

In today’s excerpt – from “Making Connections” by Anthony J. Greene. How memory works: “Many people wish their memory worked like a video recording. How handy would that be? Finding your car keys would simply be a matter of zipping back to the last time you had them and hitting ‘play.’ You would never miss […]

Latest News

F@ck 2016!
F@ck 2016!

What an incredibly crap year! Anyone feel any different? Come on raise your hand…please, prove me wrong. David Bowie, Leonard Cohen, Prince, my relationship, Donald Trump, Brexit, Allepo…the list goes on and on. And oh, did I mention my relationship? Yes?! Well, to borrow a phrase from my father who is currently visiting from the […]

Striving towards Life
,
Striving towards Life

Today’s selection — from When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi. In May 2013, at 36, Paul Kalanithi was diagnosed with stage IV metastatic lung cancer. At first, Paul prepared for death, then, he and his wife Lucy decided to have a child. ” Flush in the face of mortality, many decisions became compressed, urgent […]

A Loving Equation
,
A Loving Equation

It’s been a tough couple of months. Love and I have had some fierce skirmishes. I’ve retreated from the field, confused, battered. Now is time to examine my strategy, courageously, honestly. “Love is the hospital for our old wounds”- Hollis wrote. Love changes us, as it works on our painful personal histories (loss, abandonment, betrayal, […]

On feeling depressed…
,
On feeling depressed…

We’re not talking about the extreme, most paralysing, regions of despair – where external medical help is vital. Our target is rather the times when we feel – as indicated by Henry David Thoreau’s phrase – mired in moods of ‘quiet desperation’: a large, grey hinterland in which beneath an outward surface of endurance, we […]

How to survive an adolescent, Act 1.
, ,

How to survive an adolescent, Act 1.

“You just don’t get it! You’re so cruel! Why did you even have children if you can’t be a parent?! All my other friends parents would let them go [to the party]!” My 13 year old daughter screams as she slams the door to her unkempt room, the house fills with the now all too […]

Who Rescues  the Rescuer?

Who Rescues the Rescuer?

Being a rescuer of others in emotional distress is a popular gig. As children, many of us learnt that fulfilling this role afforded us a modicum of immunity within our often volatile family ecosystems. Being the emotional support of a sick, depressed mother, or alcoholic personality disordered father may have brought a degree of proximity […]

Insomnia- searching for the sandman.
,

Insomnia- searching for the sandman.

Things have been crap lately and I’ve spent hundreds of hours awake in the thin hours of morning. During that time, I stumbled across this article on insomnia which I found useful, enjoy. In 1914, The Lancet reported on a clergyman who was found dead in a pool; he had left behind this suicide note: […]

How memory works.
, ,
How memory works.

In today’s excerpt – from “Making Connections” by Anthony J. Greene. How memory works: “Many people wish their memory worked like a video recording. How handy would that be? Finding your car keys would simply be a matter of zipping back to the last time you had them and hitting ‘play.’ You would never miss […]

To thy own self be true.
To thy own self be true.

“Man is born free and yet everywhere, he is in chains”- Rousseau. As men, many of us are socialized to serve and maintain collective structures such as family, organizations and social institutions that all have a life of their own but require the repeated sacrifice of the individual to sustain them. When men stumble into […]