Camino or bust…

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Camino or bust…

Tax, maintenance, bond payments, insomnia, constipation…really?! This is it?! This is what the pinnacle of human evolution has to offer me?! Incredible, we are capable of such exquisite expressions of potentiality and curiosity coupled with such mind numbing drudgery and pointless repetition. I haven’t written for a while because quite frankly I’ve felt uninspired, a droll torpor has descended on me that is difficult to shake. It wears the heavy mantle of responsibility and it threatens to choke the very life blood from me. Many of my clients are choked by responsibility and its ever present familiar, guilt. Some ancient internal Calvinist fueled dictum appears to proclaim that God forbid you should ‘shirk’ your responsibilities, you will be devoured by the fires of guilt. Responsibility to what exactly? God? Country? Family? The company you work for? Where does responsibility to the Self come into the hierarchy, near the bottom? Wrangled below by guilt and self aggrandizement? To care for oneself has been mercilessly shackled to the core belief that it is selfish, that to martyr the self in service of the other is what “good” people do. What bollocks. The weary responsible (and I count myself amongst these fine suffering folk) are rarely inspired or enlivened by the crushing weight of the accumulated dross they are crucified to.
I am fighting for my life, for my freedom. I will not be enslaved indefinitely by insipid mediocrity. I will gather my thinning shekels and walk the Camino for a while in an effort to shake this psychic lethargy from my marrow. I’m not sure exactly how it’s all going to come together, but it must, for when we have no hope, then surely the battle is lost.

About the author

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Jamie Elkon http://shrinkrap.co.za/

The author can be found rummaging through life looking for nourishment in the early hours of the morning. He is slowly going sane by using his actual life and relationships to wake up.He lives in Cape Town with his teenaged daughter, two bassett hounds named Thelma and Louise and Digit... the cat. He hugs trees, has experienced numerous dark nights of the soul, collects incorrect Chinese packaging and tracks curious things to their lair.